Happy Father’s day to my real FATHERS! Single mothers, I deeply sympathize with your situation and I wish that things could have worked out between you and your baby’s father. THIS MAY HURT A LITTLE BIT, but I promise that my aim is to help.
I’d like to talk to two groups of people if I may…
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FATHERS, DONORS AND BABY’S DADDIES:
Man up and make sure you are handling your responsibilities. Being a father means way more than sending that check on time or providing for the financial needs of your family. Even if you are separated from the baby’s mother, you need to be a presence in the life of your children. They need your presence, your affirmation, your attention and most of all, your love. Your women need your protection, passion and your presence. Your woman is a gift. She is a good thing that deserves to be cherished. You will regret mistreating her and your children one day. BROKEN FAMILIES ARE CRIPPLING OUR COMMUNITIES!!! If you are not ready to be committed to her or the results of your ill conceived intimacy, for the sake of my daughter and everyone that is going to have to bear the burden of your immaturity, KEEP IT IN YOUR PANTS!!! Understand that FAMILIES are the single most beautiful institutions on this planet.
MOTHERS, SINGLE MOTHERS AND BABY’S MOMMAS:
Please on this father’s day, let’s stop with the “Happy Father’s Day to the mother’s who are doing both jobs” madness. When you celebrate your single motherhood in this way, you are sending a message that perhaps fathers aren’t really that essential.
Hmmm???
I’m sure that you are a strong mother and you no doubt are doing the very best you can with the hand you’ve been dealt. HOWEVER you are NOT a father and to suggest that you are doing both jobs is setting a dangerous example for your children and is an attack on the beauty and the sanctity of the institution known as THE FAMILY. If you find yourself in a bad situation it is not all your baby’s daddy’s fault that you and your child are there. THAT NO GOOD JIVE TURKEY that bedded you probably didn’t do so with you at gun point. We don’t like to talk about this but it is the truth.
SO CAN WE PLEASE STOP WITH THE ZANE NOVELS AND QUIT SEPARATING INTIMACY FROM COMMITMENT?
My people, if we can do this, if we can be honest with ourselves, we can begin to mend our families. True intimacy requires commitment. Nobody should be that close to you if they are not prepared to marry you PERIOD.
Folks, we’ve got a generation of boys AND GIRLS that are being raised with absolutely no concept of how important traditional families are to any society. If your family is not together—if the only examples you have are broken families, I implore you to take my word for it and get your cues from some families that have made it. Families are a beautiful thing. WE MUST MAKE FAMILIES COOL AGAIN.
There is a point that I forgot to make in this post. Single mothers, IF you are looking to add a father to your family, be careful about being so proud about assuming the roles of the father and the mother. You may not be leaving room for that real man to enter in...
ReplyDeleteMr BECK!!!!!!!!!!!! You said it!!! This is an AWESOME blog and I love it!! I am so blessed with 2 awesome fathers for my boys and my daddy was the role model for me! We need to bring back traditional values and I love it! Our babies NEED their dads, I have NEVER been a man one day of my life, so how would I know how to raise a boy, families need balance and even though I am not with my oldest sons dad, he lives right down the street and he is an amazing father, my son has been blessed with 2 constant role models of what I man is! I love it!
ReplyDeleteThank you so much and you have a wonderful and very blessed fathers day....I know Mrs. Beck will make it special for you!
Thanks for reading and thanks for saying so and thanks for your wonderful all-natural skin and hair products that can be found at http://www.koilsbynature.com/ (I'm just sayin)
ReplyDeleteYou are an awesome lady. Thanks even more for your transparency :-)
I tell you, your blogs are always right on time! I just wrote a letter to my husband to tell him all the things that a Hallmark card could not capture. My focus was to point out all the things he brings to our family that I could not do no matter how hard I try because I am not a MAN.
ReplyDeleteEricka (Hernandez-Renfro - show choir SSHS)
All I can say is Ditto! Well put!
ReplyDeleteOh, and Happy Father's Day!!
ReplyDeleteThank you Mr. Beck!!!
ReplyDeletethis was awesome! My husband and I just talked about this. Women cannot teach a boy how to be a man. She can just raise him....it does require a male to be in that role. whether he is a father, family friend, uncle, older brother, or cousin. it needs to be a male. this is the unspoken truth that no one wants to say or hear. single mothers feel as though they need that additional pat on the back. no, raising our kids is what we are suppose to do.
ReplyDeleteThanks for reading and commenting everyone. I wish we all could start having candid, truth filled conversations about the pertinent issues of our day. We can be passionate and stay respectful. Let's cut through all the sound bytes, pop culture and pre-conceived notions and try to find some truth. Truth still exists. It's not all relative... That's what I pray this blog will be about.
ReplyDelete